| I applied to the CIA once. Then I interviewed. Then I got the job. Part of the process involved listing references of people I went to high school with, worked with, lived near, and anyone I had spoken to in the last 10 years. OK, the last part isn’t true, but I wouldn’t have been surprised with all the information I had to fill out. It was a grueling process. Here’s the tricky part; you weren’t supposed to tell anyone you were a candidate for the CIA. Basically, you had to get people that knew you well enough to agree to be listed as a reference for something they didn’t know they were being listed for. You had to be able to get people to sign up for something behind a curtain. Then I had to explain to my references that “people” would be visiting their houses and interviewing them. Just showing up at their door unannounced. No appointment, no plan, no nothing. Good friends do that. They sign up without knowing all the details or consequences. They’re willing to go to bat for you and show up for you. Even if they don’t know who or what will be knocking on their door, they trust you and they sign up. Who are the people in your life that will do that for you? If you can’t think of many, ask yourself this. Who are the people that can ask themselves the same question, and you’re the first person that comes to mind? Who is thinking of you as their go-to guy/gal? Who are you willing to sign up and go all in for without knowing every detail, because you love that person and are willing to show up for them no matter what waits for you on the other side? If you can’t think of many people who would do that for you, chances are there aren’t many people you would do that for. To receive such friendship and loyalty, we must have skin in the game. A lot of times that means taking the first jump. The interview process became even more intense and was taken to the next level. I received a phone call one day while I was at a supply chain conference with other students. I missed the call but seeing the unknown number on the front of my phone with a voicemail got me excited. I knew there was a good chance it was a job offer, and I didn’t have any yet. I urgently paced back up to my hotel room to be alone and listened to the voicemail. The lady on the other end of the phone had an obscure name, like Aurora or something. She offered me the job through the voicemail and said that the paperwork would be coming in the mail to take the next steps. I waited for a call back number, there wasn’t one. I quickly dialed the number that she had called from back, excited to express my gratitude for the offer. A dead line is all I would hear on the other side, that number was not valid for placing calls. “Wow, this really is like the movies”, I thought. Once I had filled out all my paperwork it was time to schedule the final steps in the process. The compound. Yes, I literally made an appointment to go to the CIA’s compound where I would take a series of tests to confirm my acceptance into the agency. I wasn’t told everything that would take place, but there would definitely be a lie detector test. It sounded like they would be putting me through the ringer. Keep in mind, this is after I had already accepted an offer, but was contingent upon me passing all the rigorous testing. You know what else I was asked? “If I was dropped in the middle of a barren wasteland with enemy combatants nearby, what would I do? What items would I bring?” I thought strategically out loud. I told them I would bring comms, build near a water supply, weapons, maps and transportation. But thinking back on that question, none of that would have been important. I would have gotten there and not had a clue how to use the comms, the weapons, or find food and water. What I should have told them is who I was bringing with me. That’s what is important. Ask yourself that – who’s going with you? It’s probably the same people who would sign up without knowing what’s on the other side of the door. Who we choose to walk life with is more important than any materialistic thing or gadget we could have. It’s funny how the saying goes, you’re only as good as your tools – like a mechanic. Really though, you can only become as great as you can be with the people around you. No one person has the same function in our lives. Maybe you’ve tried to be everything to everyone before, and you burned out. That’s hard. We weren’t designed to do that, only Jesus is everything to everyone. But he gave each of us an instrumental part in being something to someone. Actually, many someone’s. Who are those people? You need to find them. Because they can’t become who they are without you, and you can’t be who you were made to be without them. It’s funny, I don’t remember Jesus having any fancy possessions during his time as a man. Instead, he had a bunch of friends that surrounded him. He knew it was about who he was with, and not what he had. And he showed us that. Not only did he show us that, but he showed us that who we are with doesn’t mean we’re surrounded by perfect people. What a motley crew he had. Probably the people most of us would blacklist or run from or say would “hold us back” from becoming who we are. It’s not true. It’s quite the opposite, they are the people we need to become who we are. Think of the first person you want to run from. Start running towards them. Chances are either they need you or you need them – because there’s a reason you want to run from. There is nothing easy about running to. The CIA wants to know every detail of your life before you’re in. You get probed to death. I can be picky about who I spend my time with, and that’s not always a bad thing. But not every friendship will be perfect. In fact, none will be. Because we’re broken people. Are we treating people like CIA applicants when it comes to relationships? Or are we growing with them and learning about them, learning from them and enjoying being with them for who they are? If Jesus screened his friends, he probably wouldn’t have had any. Look at who he picked to surround himself with, the people he spent the most time with. They’re the kind of people the CIA has blacklisted or is probably hunting. Jesus was hunting them too, except he was hunting them with love to liberate them and set them free. The CIA is hunting them to put them down or lock them up. If there’s one quality we could take from the CIA, it’d be there resiliency. Their undying will to find the bad guys and learn everything about them and complete the mission. What if we took that mentality with the people that are difficult to love in our own lives? What if we took the time to learn about them, the things that made them the way they are, and love them – resiliently. Chasing them down, but to offer love and freedom. Can you imagine if our resumes were a list of our mistakes and failures? Unemployment would be pretty high, and not many of us would have jobs. Those that did would be liars. It’s not that we should completely ignore people’s past, it’s that we should start to take the good things we see and encourage them about who they’re becoming. People need to hear that because, let’s face it, people have been in and are in dark places. When the world hunts them and blacklists them for their flaws, who are we being? We have the chance to be Jesus and reach for those resumes that are at the bottom of the pile and place them on top, giving those who hardly get a look our first look. Showing someone who is outcasted and ostracized a love that tells them they’re wanted and needed. Every time we call these good things out in people, we help them take a step closer to becoming who they are. We help them find the gold in their scars. This is an investment. And anyone who knows anything about investing knows this – people are the most difficult and challenging commodity. People are not problems to be solved, they’re not something you can throw money at to fix, and they are deeper than anything else in this world. There is sometimes significant risk to ourselves, we can’t stay behind the comfort of a screen or hide behind our dollar bills if we’re investing in people, not if we’re doing it right. Jesus spent most of his time investing in people. And there’s something I’ve learned from him about that. People are not problems that need to be fixed. I think people are more like a puzzle set or something instead. Except no one comes with a complete set of parts. Sometimes we try and put the wrong part in the wrong spot, and it works for a while, but it really doesn’t fill the hole or complete the picture. Each of us has different parts of this puzzle that when they come together, form the Kingdom of God. I think God did this on purpose so that we would understand the importance of needing to be with each other. Your neighbor has a piece you need, the homeless man on the street has a piece you need, and you have something they need too. Don’t be fooled though, you can’t just get the piece and get out and run. Many have and will try this, so they can get their puzzle pieces with no cost to themselves and advance in whatever way they desire. But it’s not sustainable. To fill the holes and see the whole picture, you have be willing to invest yourself fully. When we do that, we heal and fill holes that were once painful gaps, we bridge new connections and see parts of the work God is doing that we couldn’t before. We each have gifts that we can offer to each other and pull the greater things out of each other. Sometimes we have the pieces we need, we just fail to see it that way. Investing in a relationship can bring a new perspective in that allows you to see what you truly have, and the greater picture God is piecing together in your life. Who are you bringing with you to get dropped off in the middle of nowhere? Who’s signing up to be on your team? Who are you signing up for with no questions asked? Who are we blacklisting and avoiding because they have an ugly resume? You have the power to take that resume and put on the top of the stack. When you really understand the way Jesus loves you, you’ll understand he loves the person at the bottom of the stack in the world’s eyes the same. He says the first will be last and the last get a crown. Status, money, experience, and wealth are all worthless in the eyes of Jesus. Our lives are about how we love. You’re broken. But you have the pieces to help someone else become who they are, and they have the one’s to help you. If you’re looking for a career in the CIA, you have your work cut out for you. If you’re looking to live a life with Jesus, you have a life of being with people and hunting them with love to look forward to. One of my best friends and men that would show up for me is my friend Thomas. Thomas has a little girl named Hudson. She’s adorable. She also thinks I live at Chic fil A, which I think is cool – and she does too. She has all the personality in the world for a 3-year-old. This past summer on a trip to Maine, we were paling around with Hudson on the beach. Hudson was enjoying building sand castles and picking up sticks and rocks of all kinds. She managed to get a hold of a big stick. Using her newly found toy, Hudson drew a big circle in the sand. “This is the circle of love” she declared. She went on to name everyone in it, “Mommy and Daddy and Ya-Ya are all in here” she said with a smile. I jumped in, “Hudson, can I be in it?”. She looked down for a second to ponder, “No”, she responded thoughtfully. Defeated, I laughed, “Why not?”. She looked up at me, “Well…maybe someday”. That was good enough for me. We can’t get into the circle so easily, even Hudson knows that. We have to have skin in the game in each other’s lives first. I guess I will have to get to know her a little better before I belong in her circle. Maybe if I bring Hudson some ice-cream from my house (Chic fil A), I can jump the line and get into the circle a little faster. |